WHY WE TRAVEL
May the best you've ever seen, be the worst you'll ever see.
On the road, like pilgrims, we can become seekers. Even in this age of unprecedented abundance, many of us hunger for something more: meaning and purpose. By leaving home, we learn more about home, and we learn more about ourselves. We pause, we reflect, and we hope to grow. - Rick Steves
WHY WE TRAVEL
Travel can bring us happiness, joy, peace, frustration, anxiety, and worry all in one trip. You don’t quite know which emotion or feeling will hit, which day, but you know that the experience of traveling somewhere new is, and will forever be, far from perfect. Perfection is unattainable; however, the lessons you will learn from each adventure—good or bad—are everlasting.
You will have fun. You will get frustrated. You will wish you lived in this glorious new destination. You will count down the minutes until you’re back on a plane heading to the place you call home. All of these emotions are part of the journey; they’re part of the experience. We don’t travel because we know what’s going to happen, we travel because we DON’T know what’s going to happen. We’re curious of the unknown, of what lies ahead, and we’re not afraid to be curious about the unknown. The unknown is what excites us, drives us, and lights a fire in our hearts so big that we are pushed to each and every corner of the world.
The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. — Christopher McCandless
From our earliest memories, as young children, we’re taught about great adventures (Treasure Island, Peter Pan, The Little Prince, and King Arthur, to name a few) that become engrained in our psyche. As we move into our adolescence, these adventures continue and take shape into real life activities, such as: youth camps, sporting events, concerts, festivals, carnivals, sleepovers, campouts, and field trips. Any and all of these events, or adventures, are the foundation of what, inherently, becomes the thing, or things, that make us fulfilled. Happiness is a feeling that can come and go; you can have a bad day, but you can be happy that the bad day is over. While happiness can be fleeting, fulfillment is enduring, offering a profound sense of achievement and purpose. Unlike happiness, which is fleeting and difficult to attain, fulfillment is a state of being that is all about accepting who you are, being grateful for what you have, and remaining optimistic about the future. Side benefit: You may find happiness as you seek fulfillment. And fulfillment is actually easier to achieve—especially when you let go of the myths about happiness.1
Twenty years from now, you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. — Mark Twain
The difference between an inconvenience and an adventure is merely a matter of perspective. Every day is a chance to explore if we only approach life with the curiosity of an explorer seeking new experiences and new perspectives.2
In a day and age when everyone has an opinion about everything (looking at you, Twitter) we should ask ourselves: how in the hell am I able to have a detailed, informed opinion on something I have never experienced, myself? Adventures and experiences shape our world view more than anything else, so don’t be a promotional agent for some social media exercise. Build your own opinion, and don’t be afraid for it to be fluid. It’s okay to disagree with someone else. When you’re coming from a place of perspective, and not fear, you will be less inclined to take offense to someone else’s opinion. Instead, that difference of opinion may make you think about WHY you have the perspective you have.
There is an engrained “fear” of the unknown, especially when we travel, and this can cause us to choose the “safe” route. This is why large hotel chains, online booking engines, and chain restaurants/shops all build establishments around one another in every new city you visit. It’s safe and comfortable to stay in a large Hilton Hotel, next to a McDonalds and Starbucks, down the street from an American shopping mall, surrounded by well-reviewed restaurants from other Americans, because we are led to believe that this will help soothe our fear of the unknown. When, in fact, this is the opposite of experiencing anything new. Instead of having your guard up, fearing the unknown, choose to have fun and be amazed. Choose to learn. Choose to become a student of the world.
Be brave. Be bold. Be adventurous. Be kind.
When traveling with someone, take large doses of patience and tolerance with your morning coffee. — Helen Hayes
ON TRAVELING WITH FAMILY
Traveling with family is hard. Each and every one of us has decades of happiness, guilt, love, and shame built up with each member of our family. We build a short hand with family members, and we also have a short fuse with family members. We yearn to spend quality time with family members, and we can’t stop watching the time with family members.
C’est la via.
I’m happy to say that, in my experience, traveling with family members can and should be low risk / high reward. Will the thought of being with family, in closed quarters, for long periods of time, cause anxiety, stress, and nervousness? Yes. Will a trip with family members, in the aftermath, bring great memories, joy, and a full heart? Yes. We travel all over the world with friends, whom we love, but, as we become adults, we take fewer meaningful adventures with the people who brought us into this life or with the people we grew up with in such close quarters.
When talking about certain friendships, there’s often a saying: “they’re not friends, they’re my chosen family.” In my opinion, the meaning of this saying is: we trust each other so much that we have no fear of hurting the other person’s feelings or telling them the absolute truth about how we feel; it’s a safe environment. Family is sacred, and there are things we are allowed to say to family members that we aren’t allowed to say to anyone else.
I’ve been fortunate enough to experience some amazing adventures with members of my family—who are all very different from one another—and the small risk is quite easily worth the large reward. How many people can say they took their Grandmother to Italy, after she beat cancer, for her 80th birthday?
I heard something the other day that made me really think about the relationships I have with my family: “how many Christmases do you have left with one another?” For people that live a good distance away from their relatives, like we do, it’s a very interesting measuring tool for how much time you have left with one another. We obviously make an effort to see our respective families more than once a year, but, the older we get, the further along our family members begin to grow and nurture their own respective families. So, the “available” time for one another becomes less and less, as each year passes.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: time is our greatest commodity — don’t waste it. One large, unforgettable adventure is worth 50 one-hour, irregular visits. It’s important to appreciate the smaller moments in life, but it’s also important to remember that, sometimes, members of our family need help to get out of their comfort zones.
Take a leap of faith; plan a family adventure; be the comfort your family needs, but doesn’t know how to ask for.
A journey is best measured in friends rather than miles. — Tim Cahill
ON TRAVELING WITH FRIENDS
I, more than most people I know, have been lucky enough to share in some amazing adventures with the people I call my friends. From Italy, to Mexico, Scotland, England, Ireland, Canada, across the States, and through multiple wine countries, I’ve experienced some amazing adventures with many of the most important people in my life.
Traveling with friends offers us a respite from our daily lives, while providing a familiarity on an otherwise unknown journey. You may only enjoy parts of your trip, but you will always enjoy the special moments and extended time you have with your friends. Those special moments, however big or small, will become always-evolving campfire tales for the years to come. The details of the stories may change, but the shared memory will never fade. The shared experience will be the North Star of the friendship — always guiding us back to the connection that first bonded us together.
Most of the time, the destination is what excites it, inspires us, and embarks us on the journey; however, when traveling with friends, the journey is the destination. We’ll spend all of the pre-planning figuring out how to get to Point A, how to continue on to Point B, and how to end at Point C, but, inevitably, what we’ll remember most from our journey will be all of the tiny moments in between. When traveling with a group of people, it’s about the micro, not the macro. The shared experience—the ability to see, hear, or feel something new and unique with other people—is often more important than event or destination itself.
Friends will forever be the remedy for all of our greatest fears in life, because, in the end, our biggest fear is being alone. As Helen Keller said, “walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.” In travel, we might decide to venture to a place that doesn’t live up to our expectations, but, if we’re traveling with friends, those expectations are subsided by the camaraderie within the group.
Like each new destination, friendships are ever evolving; just as the destination will continue to change, so should the friendship.
I would like to travel the world with you twice. Once to see the world. Twice, to see the way you see the world. — Anonymous
ON TRAVELING WITH A LOVER
The common saying goes: “there’s no better way to test compatibility than to travel with someone.”
Amen.
In Jon Krakauer’s incredible biography, Into the Wild, we follow Christopher McCandless’ (aka Alexander Supertramp’s) journey as he goes from “leaving the world behind” to his last days before he dies, alone, inside a bus, deep into the Alaskan wilderness. The entire book is a reflection on having experiences on your own vs. having experiences with others. Up until the very end, you’re certainly led to believe that Chris was a preacher for the quiet, solitary life; however, Krakauer prints some photos of what was found, in the bus around the death scene, and there’s a specific, notated page in an old copy of Doctor Zhivago that seems to tell another truth. A segment of the page is highlighted, but at the top of the page Chris wrote: HAPPINESS ONLY REAL WHEN SHARED.
I’ve traveled on my own, I’ve traveled with friends, and I’ve traveled with family; however, there’s nothing quite like experiencing something new, exciting, and adventurous with someone you want to share your life with. It can be painful, at times, but what is life if we aren’t constantly trying to show the person we love the things we love? We want, nay need, our lover to be interested in the things we’re interested in. It’s certainly a fault, more often than not, but it can also be a good place to start. There’s nothing quite like the experience of showing the love of your life something that means so much to you; the chance to see your lover experience and enjoy the things that bring you joy is a feeling of complete euphoria.
We yearn to be happy, and we want to show our lovers what it is that makes us happy…AND we really want (sometimes need) them to also get happiness out of the things we love. It’s not always going to happen—our partners ability to immediately love and desire the things we love and desire—but from our earliest days together, to our final days together, it should always be a priority of ours to keep each other interested. Adventure, spontaneity, and curiosity, if you’re open to it, can be a beautiful, lifelong endeavor.
If you’re lucky enough to find someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, don’t lose the spark that started it all; keep being desirable; keep being spontaneous; keep sharing in the excitement together. Traveling with a lover, amongst many other things, can help you stay curious with one another.
The fire burns as bright as you want it to burn, but it only takes the light of a small candle to keep the flame going.
The heat of the fire can surely match the intensity of your desire.
If I'm an advocate for anything, it's to move. As far as you can, as much as you can. Across the ocean, or simply across the river. The extent to which you can walk in someone else's shoes or at least eat their food, it's a plus for everybody. Open your mind, get up off the couch, move.
— Anthony Bourdain
Investment in travel is an investment in yourself.
Today could be that day.
Travel can mean many different things, to many different people, and all of them are valid. You could decide to go see the Great Wall of China, or you could decide to go to a new restaurant, exhibit, or event that’s a town over from where you currently live. But, like Bourdain, I’m a proponent for traveling as far as you can, and as much as you can. The further you get away from your comfort zone, the harder it will be to continue on your same day-to-day routine. A sedentary lifestyle is not a lifestyle any of us should strive for; getting up, getting out, and seeing something new is the most important thing you can do.
Today could be that day.
Eventually, the number of undiscovered areas on our planet will get to zero. We will continue to move on to the ocean, as well as to the sky, up to space, and further beyond our wildest imaginations. Why? Because we’re curious about what else is out there. For better or worse, we’re in a perpetual state of FOMO.
Today could be that day.
We need to discover and learn about new things, because it’s important for us to tell others about what we saw or discovered. Why? Because we’re storytellers. From the earliest days of mankind, we told stories — whether through art, infrastructure, or scripture, it was important for us to let everyone else know what the hell was going on. The more adventures we had, the more stories we had. The more stories we had, the more human connection we had. We will continue to uphold the storytelling ways of our ancestors before us, because, as previously mentioned, we need human connection; we need a way to communicate with one another, like storytelling, because it brings individuals together, relationships form, and the human race survives and thrives. Each and every connection we make is the future of an untold story.
Today could be that day.
Traveling somewhere new is the exploration of a physical destination, as well as the exploration of a an individual purpose. A physical destination will teach us something new about someone, or something, but the journey before, during, and after the destination will teach us something new about ourselves. The more we learn about other people, places, or things, the better we are as a human race. The more we learn about ourselves, the better we are as a human race. Physical and mental exploration both start from a seed of curiosity. We started as explorers, and we’ll end as explorers. It’s what we know. It’s how we’ll grow.
Today could be that day.
